How to be Mr Perfect 101

Have you seen this video by Felixia Yeap floating through Facebook? I gotta admit, her boobs what she said really caught my attention.

I used to chat actively in a forum where all the guys there judge every single female who pops up. 'Airport', 'fugly face' and 'fat' were commonly thrown at them. Then when we met up for group gatherings, I actually found out that those men who said the worst things actually looked the worst!

Enough of you guys judging us! Do you fulfill OUR criteria instead? These are the DOs and DON'Ts from my view.

DON'Ts

1) DO NOT go on a diet that makes us feel fat eating next to you. We never want to feel fat or ugly when we're with you. As far as I'm concerned, I'm the prettiest princess with my bf. I love to eat so it really turns me off when I'm the only one eating or if I eat more than the guy. However, I understand if you're trying to get fit by eating the right food and working out.

2) DO NOT compare me with another girl, especially if she's prettier. Even if you're using her as an example to tell me how I look better, you're still giving me the vibe that you see me as an object on a shelf which you purchased simply because I looked better than the lamp next to me. Yes, you bought me. But I'm still a lamp.

3) DO NOT ask me to get rid of the cockroach for you. Just like Felixia, I had a similar experience where a buffed guy and I encountered a baby cockroach and he actually asked me to 'settle' the roach as he's afraid of it. It happened again on another occasion with a tiny green caterpillar-like fella about an inch big. #truestory

4) DO NOT ask me to look/dress better if you look like a homeless man. Ticks me off when guys are constantly so demanding when they themselves do not pass their own standards. Urgh.. Improve yourself and you will automatically get better girls! Simple logic.

5) DO NOT bug my friends if you're an insurance agent or similar. This might sound ridiculous but I won't date men whose work involves selling insurance, MLM or any sort of aggressive recruitment. Simply because I don't want him to bug me or my friends.

"Eh eh.. Your mom want to buy insurance anot? What about your dad, grandmother, grandfather, aunty, uncle, neighbour, dog, hamster..." NONONONONO!

6) DO NOT make our arguments public. There was a guy.. who would openly discuss about our arguments on previously mentioned forum and people who actually knew us would come up to me and ask "what happen to you and _____?" Do you know how embarrassing that is?!

DOs

1) I'm the prettiest princess. Remember that.

2) Cuddles. Lots of it. I cannot even express how much I love men who cuddle me. It's also the cure for PMS.

3) Listen. Or at least pretend that you do BUT make sure we don't find out or you will share the fate of a marshmallow over a fire.

4) Look smart, be smart. Try to look presentable especially when we're going somewhere nice. I like to makeup and look good but it doesn't work if you're wearing a white singlet and torn shorts with messy hair. Also, be knowledgeable. Girls don't dig guys who only know all the tactics to winning Dota. Don't ask me why my saliva isn't sweet cos all girls' saliva are supposed to be sweet. This is unfortunately also a #truestory.

5) Love me in public places. Alright, this is pretty subjective since many people don't like PDA. And I don't mean a tongue wrestle in the open alright. I like the occasional kiss, hugs, holding hands, cuddling during movies (cuddles!) or sharing an ice cream with you.

I also like men who are brave, protective (not OVERLY protective) and warm. Yes, if you have a hot body like Jacob you pass (I'm talking about temperature okay). Very useful in cinemas.

Guys - I hope you learned something from this short course on How to be Mr Perfect 101.
Girls - Is there something you want to add?